I've alays fancied dot I'm sharp, Und know my ways aboud.
Although I am a German,
I'm mistaken, I find out.
For every time I get a start,
I seem to miss my way.
Und every business I get in,
Is certain not to pay.
I've been clerk in a barber shop,
Vere work is not so slow.
I've kept all kinds of little sdores,
But nothing seems to go.
I run an elevator vonce,
Dot did go up and down. And now I am a vaiter,
In a restaurant up town.

CHORUS

Vaiter, Vaiter, Hot potato,
Vaiter now den Vaiter,
Vere's dot lamb, vere's dot lamb.
You's dot mutton coming vaiter.
How's about dot veal und ham, veal und ham.
Fried eel, Oot meal, Toast bread, Calf's head,
Blue fish, Warm dish, Sauer-kraut, stir about.
Dot's de vay dey holler at me,
Every moment mit a frown.
Hurry, Flurry, me dey worry,
At the restaurant up town.

At night dere's clearing dings avay,
Und picking up der corks.
At morning cleaning tables,
Und a cleaning knives und forks.
Der boss, he will have everyding
Look neat as a ny pin.
Und he is alvays grumbling,
'Til de custmoers come in.
Ve get some funny customers,
I tell you, now und den.
Dere's some dot cannot eat at all,
Some vant to come again.
Some spend two dollars on a meal,
Some vant it for a cent.
Some get a check, get near de door,
Und den quick out dey vent.

CHORUS

I dink I leave dis business,
For to stand it now I can't.
I never vos intended
To work in a restaurant.
I'll start a lager beer saloon,
In some place dot is near.
Give chrosmo's to the man,
vat drinks a keg of lager beer.
To be a vaiter und vork hard,
I tell you is no fun.
My legs, my shoulders and my loints,
In fact are over done.
I might get in a valking match,
Und skip de tra-la-lee.
In fact I could stand anyding,
'Cept ven you yell at me.

CHORUS