The rhyme about Dick Cheney and the Valentines Day Massacre was published on the Windsor School site. However, it had to be changed because the Windsor site censor objected to "golf balls" and substituted "golf dangly bits" instead. It worked out all right in the end because I changed balls to shots. However, I couldn't help penning the following item about this ridiculous situation.


I’m dangly bits crazy,
I’m dangly bits mad.
This censor thing has robbed this site
Of any bit of sense it had.
I thought that we had fixed it.
I thought we'd got it done.
However, it still seems that
This censor thing has won.

There aren’t too many games around
That don’t use dangly bits.
So how are we to play them now?
This whole thing gives me fits.
But wouldn’t it be funny
To hear the huge applause,
When Beckham takes his dangly bits
Right down the field and scores!

And then there’s Tiger, burning bright.
He gets a hole in one.
He tees off with his dangly bits,
But still he hasn’t won.
With Ernie Els behind him
And still eight holes to go.
His dangly bits may trip him up,
But is he worried, No!

When Kobe tries to hit all net,
His bits get in the way.
He dingle, dangle, dangles,
But the Shaq shouts “Not today”!
And tennis wouldn’t be the same,
Without that fuzzy sphere.
There'd be no Sharapova,
If there's no game, I fear.

All we’d have left to do is fight.
There’d just be constant war.
Those games have kept us sober.
For now and ever more.
So let's just keep on playing,
Keep our dangly bits intact.
The game is what it’s all about,
And surely, that’s a fact!